Sardar SMS Jokes

Sardars are very funny people. They make you laugh with their funny sayings and their attitude. They have power to laugh at themselves. There are so many Jokes made on Sardars. These Sardar Jokes are Packed with humor and fun and powerful enough to give you a belly laugh. Here are some of my favorite Funny Sardar SMS Jokes to tickle your Funny Bone.

Two Sardarjis, both student of I.I.T, Kanpur, were talking about the American Astronauts.
One said to the other, "What's the big deal about going to the moon-anybody can go to the moon. We are sardars we will go direct to the sun."
"But if we get within 13 million miles from the sun, we'll melt."
And the first answered, "So what, we'll go at night."

Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said 'Switched Off'!"
Banta : Nahi Pape, it's my HELLO TUNE!

Once, two Sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games of chess to ass the time.
They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends
dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -
"Come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!"

The Sardarji Doctor to his patient:
"It's very important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before you feel the pain."

GAMBLER Surjit Singh saw that his friend Baljit Singh was very depressed.
"What happened ?" asked Surjit.
"Yaar, I lost Rs. 1000 in a bet yesterday."
"How come ?"
"Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV. I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet."
"But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?"
"Yaar, I bet on the highlights too "

Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says... Drink quickly..... .
Wife asks why...
sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10

Once a Sardarji went to the city of Mumbai for the first time to meet his father. His father had asked him to keep walking in the direction of the sunrise until he eventually reached hishouse. Since, the Sardarji was new to the city he decided to ask a passerby the direction in which the sun rose in Mumbai - east, west, north or south?The passerby who was also a Sardarji thought for some time and then said, "Main bhi is sheher mein naya aaya hoon!" ( I am also new in this city!)

Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u'll die.
Santa: U'll die bcoz haven't u heard train is coming on platform?

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket
match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji. He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

Sardarji, tell me ...., what is the meaning of SMS ?
Sardar angrily said, i know -
it means....
S - Sardaron ke
M - Mazak udane ki
S - Service

Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write against mother tongue.?
Santa: Very long!

Sardar: Should i buy tickets to my children.
Conductor: Yes only if they are above 8.
Sardar: Thank god i have only 6 children

Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chickens to begin with. A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back at t he dealer for
another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died. 'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa, 'I think I'm planting them too deep.'

Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.
Nxt day Headline:Blood Bank lutya gya.

Q6. What will! U call a person who is leaving India ??
Socho....... ........
Ans:- Hindustan Lever (Leaver).

in an interview,
interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
SARDAR: dhuurrrrrrrrrr..
Interviewr shouts: stop it !
SARDAR: dhurr dhup dup dup dup..

Sardar ji.. Says I Love u to his galfrend.. And suddenly falls on the floor...
GalFrnd.. What iz this?
Sarda Ji.. O ji, i'm falling in love )

Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?" The sardarji replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it had I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too.

Sardar ji is buying a TV
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."

Ek Sardar ne ek bachy se pucha k tum ko A,B,C Aaty hai to bachy ne keha k mujy 9 tak aty hia..
Sardar ne bachy se keha k oyee Ullu k pathy 9 A,b,c main nahe aata. yeh to Alif,, Be,,Main ata hai:)

Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *again* barefoot!"

Fifteen minutes into the flight from Mankuwa City to Sukhpur city, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed.. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left." Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry ... we can fly just fine on two engines." An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours.But don't worry ... we still have one engine left." A sardarji passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"

Why do Sardars work seven days a week? So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.

Santa and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine."
His second friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber, the other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine."
Santa says, "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief. "No I'm serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."

Sweet love quotes

Are you looking for sweet love quotes to send to your loved one. Then you come to right place baby. This page provide some of the best Cute And Sweet Quotes. Use these cute sweet love quotes and maked your loved one feel happy and express your love.



For one human being to love another:
that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks;
the ultimate, the last test and proof,
the work for which all other work is but preparation. ----Rainer Maria Rilke

When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out. ----Elizabeth Bowen (1899-1973)

Love is everything it's cracked up to be…It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. -----Erica Jong

Wild Nights! Wild Nights! were I with thee
Wild Nights would be our luxury.
Futile the winds to a heart in port, Gone with the compass
Gone with the chart--Rowing in Eden.
Ah the Sea! Might I but moor-- Tonight in thee ------Emily Dickinson

For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation. -----Rainer Maria Rilke

Love can make you do things that you never thought possible! ---- Phil Collins

Love and electricity are one in the same, my dear. If you do not feel the jolt in your soul every time a kiss is shared, a whisper is spoken, a touch is felt, then your not really in love at all. ------ C. J. Franks

If you don't love yourself, How can you expect someone else to love you??????

The world is too dangerous for anything but truth and too small for anything but love.We can never really love anybody with whom we never laugh.Love is in the giver, not the gift. ---- William Sloan Coffin

A life’s worth, in the end, isn’t measured in hours, or dollars. It’s measured by the amount of love exchanged along the way.----- Douglas C. Means

Love is like an hourglass with the heart filling up as the brain empties.----- Jules Renard

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.------ David Bissonette

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him.------Ralph Waldo Emerson

Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never even knew.

Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.- Aristotle


If marriages are made in heaven

Q: If marriages are made in heaven,
than what are made in Hell?

Answer: The days after marriage!

Funny sms

When i open my eyes every morning
When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you.... Why should only i suffer!!!
One day Santas Girlfriend asks him,
One day Santas Girlfriend asks him, Darling, om our Engagement will you give me a RING?Santa:Ya sure, Give me ur Telephone No.
When I was born Devil said..
When I was born Devil said...Oh Shit!!! Another GOD!!!..& When u were born devil said ...Oh Shit!!!!Competition...!!! ....
Fill in the blank...Im ur .....friend-
Fill in the blank...Im ur .....friend- a)-Cute b)-Sweet c)-Loving d)-Boy/Girl e)-Best of all Reply is a must...
Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE-
Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE- C-Come,O-On,L-Lets, L-Love, E-Each,G-Girl,E-Equally......Thats why boys go to college regularly....
Who said english is easy???Fill in the blank
Who said english is easy???Fill in the blank with YES or No... 1.-----I dont have brain... 2.-----I dont have sence... 3.-----I am stupid....
If ur world is spining Round & Round.
If ur world is spining Round & Round..& Round....Ur heart is beating fast ,do u think its LOVE? na Munna na its called high B/P...
Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year,
Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year, Happy Easter, Good luck on Valentines, Spooky Halloween & Happy Birthday Now bug off and don't annoy me for the next 12 months!!!!
what happend 2 ur mobile?
what happend 2 ur mobile? i was trying 2 call u but i got this msg: welcome 2 D jungle network,D monkey u r tring 2 call is on tree plz try later.
First the engagement ring, then t
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering
Last night I lay in my bed
Last night I lay in my bed looking at the beautiful stars, the moon and the sky...then i thought where the fuck is my roof
Birdy birdy in the sky dropped
Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye, I don't worry I don't cry, I'm just happy that cows can't fly!
If your a Vegetarian to be nice
If your a Vegetarian to be nice to animals, why are you eating there food
I'm a killer, i kill people for money
I'm a killer, i kill people for money, but you are my friend
I KILL YOU FOR FREE !!
Its been a rough day.I got up this
Its been a rough day.I got up this morning,put on a shirt N a button fell off.I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off.I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom
Jesus says to John come forth ill
Jesus says to John come forth ill give you eternal life. John came fifth he won a toaster
At dis moment in time 10 million people
At dis moment in time 10 million people r having sex.5 million people r drinking coffee.100 million people r sleeping & 1 stupid fool is reading my text!pass on
The rain makes all things beautiful
The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn’t it rain on you?
i want u 2 know dat our friendship
i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again
An independant study has proven
An independant study has proven dat those who have a bad sex life & who are crap in bed are readin dis message in their right hand!
I'm @ the police station
I'm @ the police station now been done 4 drink driving.Urine sample was positive so I nicked the sample.they r now doin me 4 taking the piss
girls are like phones.
girls are like phones. we like to be held and talked too- but if u press the wrong button u'll be disconnected!

Let the boss speak first

Let the boss speak first

Once, Boss, Officer & Clerk going 4 a meeting.
They saw a Jin.
Jin said: As i fulfill 3 wishes at a time
But u r 3 persons so i will fulfill 1 wish for each.

Clerk said: Send me to America with a lot of money clerk disappears. (wish fulfilled)
Officer said: Send me to Paris with a lot of beautiful girls. officer disappears. (wish fulfilled)
Jin said to Boss: what is ur wish?
He said: “I want these two idiots back at office after lunch.”
Moral: Always Let the BOSS SPEAK 1st

Desperate to get married

Marriage is like a public toilet

Those waiting outside are desperate to get in
&
Those inside are desperate to come out.

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
“Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back:
“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”